Socialization

The biggest concern that would be voiced to my mother about Homeschooling, was the question of socialization. How were we going to get it if we never left the house? This is one of the misconceptions about homeschooling that I hope to help correct. We have all seen the reclusive homeschoolers. They are socially inept, and seem terribly shy. Nice but strange, they seem unable to communicate with an average person. The misconception is that these individuals are exclusive to the homeschooling community. I have seen many of these children in the public sector, and just because they went to school doesn't change that they are misfits.

So, lets talk about socialization. We all want our children to grow up as confident, personable, and capable individuals. This goal is a worthy one, and it is our job to help shape the path that they will take to get there. While I agree that being around other people is an important part of that path, I do have a slightly different idea on HOW that should come about.

My parents were very social people. They were actively involved in their church and were always on the look out for people they enjoyed being around. They used to have these monthly parties where couples from all over would come and play games until the wee hours of the morning. The only rules? "No drinking. No drugs. Bring a treat to share." Aside from the monthly fun, friends and family were always stopping by, or we were going to someone else's place. We would gather as families. Mixed ages would relax or play as they wanted. Children would run around outside while the adults lounged in the family room. As I grew, I was allowed to participate in some of the adult time. At the age of 12, I could join the games (pictionary and trivial pursuit were some of the favorites) for an hour or two before being sent to bed. By the time I was 16, I joined full force and loved every minute of it.

Birthday parties at our house were very simple. Mom provided Ice Cream and Cake, and then let us play. We were not allowed to be exclusive. When we invited people to our birthday parties, we invited whole families. This meant that we would often have 30 children of all ages running around. My Mom felt it was silly to just invite my friends, when their siblings were friends with my brothers and sisters too. This also meant that her friends came to stay, since they didn't have to leave children at home. Thus, the parents enjoyed themselves too.

With all of the social things that we did, I discovered I was often better equipped than my public schooled friends to handle different situations. I was just as comfortable with their parents as I was with them, and could also get along with their siblings. I found that their parents liked me, and encouraged the friendship.

The passage into adulthood was an easy one for me. It was natural and complete. I had been slowly encouraged and helped along by my parents, given more and more responsibility for my choices, and they really enjoyed my company. The same is true for my eight younger siblings (there are still three younger than 18, but they are on the right path.) Everyone who meets them is impressed by their friendliness and ease among people. Even the ones who are shy or quiet are not socially inept.

I think, in the end, it is how we encourage our children to blossom and grow than where we decide to school them that will make them capable adults. Practice does indeed make perfect, so it may require a little bit of extra effort on behalf of Homeschooling Parents to bring other people into the lives of their children.

My Thoughts on Math

My Mother used to joke that we were not allowed to learn math until we were out of the house.

I have found that often math is a weakness with homeschoolers, but not in the way most people expect. Math is a huge focus in our society. Math proficiency means that you would make a good scientist, doctor, engineer, etc. These professions bring larger pay checks, and so everyone is encouraged and even categorized by their ability to manipulate large sums.

My Mother decided not to focus on math or science. We still studied and learned it, but the real focus in our home was reading and history. I suspect that this happened naturally as a result of my Mother's insecurity in the math department. She was never very confident in it, and after teaching us the basic arithmetic, left it up to us to pursue the subject further. Whenever we were interested in learning more then she could teach us, she would find us a mentor. She tried really hard to find people who loved the subject that she was deficient in. By doing that, she showed us that every subject can indeed be fun. This way of teaching also gave me the confidence that I can learn anything if I wanted to.

I never really had a strong urge to learn mathematics, and was quite happy with my education. Whenever criticized about it, I would simply shrug and say "When I need to learn it, I will." It didn't bother me at all that I was behind in this particular subject. Suddenly, at about 21, I had this intense and focused desire to learn economics and investing. This passion has continued to stay with me, and I continue to devour everything I can on the subject. This focus has led to an unfolding of math in a way I didn't expect, but that I really enjoy.

Another experience that I had with Math came when I was a Mentor at a Charter School. I had to teach math to my students. I taught the Pre-Algebra class, and really enjoyed it. I found that as I read about what I needed to teach them, I actually understood it! Not only that, but as they asked questions, we would learn the language of Mathematics together. My favorite class was when we figured out WHY when you multiply negative numbers the answer is a positive one. Pretty cool.

The real key to successful Homeschooling is to give your child the confidence and tools they need to learn anything they need to. If they leave your home lacking, you know they can make it up. This is done by allowing them to spend most of their time focusing on their strengths. When this happens, children are involved in the passion and excitement of learning, and they gain confidence about their abilities. Then you can give them a few assignments in their weakness, to help them grow, but as long as you don't make it a Big Deal, they will not lose their confidence as they struggle with it.

A Work In Progress

This blog is currently a work in progress. As I respond very well to questions, I would love to have any and all questions about homeschooling that you have. Just leave a question in the comment section.

I grew up homeschooled, and am now 29 with two little ones of my own whom I plan on homeschooling too. As many people have asked me about my experiences, I decided to start this blog to answer those questions. So ask away!